Lately, i have been wondering a lot about all the judgments we pass around every now and then about so many things, so many people we may or may not know..
Passing judgments has always been a quality we humans have preserved generations after generations.
we judge people on so many different levels..
it can be as harmless as 'the lady from the 3rd floor has no sense of fashion'
or as serious an accusation as 'her husband is a jackass'
to an extra insensitive one as 'my boss is a loner'..
The thing is, most of the times we don't even realize that our judgments are based on some preconceived notions. Judging essentially means to 'assess something against a standard'.
who is to decide this standard?
who is to say whats proper/improper , what is meant to be and what should have been in its stead..
try an Exercise : try not to judge anyone for a day! -- You wont make past your first hour at work!
and u'd shortly begin with your usual,
'that lady there needs sense matching her shoes!'
'oh dear! that blob guy should not be eating that chocolate'
'why did she divorce such an amazing guy!'
'she needs to tune down a bit'
now hold it there and think a little..
probably that is the only pair of shoes she has, probably he is eating that chocolate bar cause of all the stress at work! maybe she had to divorce that 'amazing' guy because he kept on abusing her parents or beating her the hell up! and she was tuned high because she was trying to keep away from her sad thoughts and just go out have some fun!
how does that make u feel?
now this isn't that pretty a picture, is it?
did your judgment ease their pain? did your judgment make u happy ? no it did not! none of it was useful! Then why judge at all?
I hope someday we all rid ourselves of this tedious self assigned task of judging everyone and everything around us and just let them be, let things be the way they are..
we are all just playing the game, no one has been given an extra edge or a headstart or the power to see some transparent script in the air written by the goddess of light indexing things that are meant to be in a particular order.
Just accept them the way they are.
they all are precious.
Lets us all try pausing our judgment machine for a while and try loving people instead for who they are. Let us please try ..
a little 'warning triangle' for all the 'judges' out there : while you are passing your smartypants judgmental comments, people are judging you!
Passing judgments has always been a quality we humans have preserved generations after generations.
we judge people on so many different levels..
it can be as harmless as 'the lady from the 3rd floor has no sense of fashion'
or as serious an accusation as 'her husband is a jackass'
to an extra insensitive one as 'my boss is a loner'..
The thing is, most of the times we don't even realize that our judgments are based on some preconceived notions. Judging essentially means to 'assess something against a standard'.
who is to decide this standard?
who is to say whats proper/improper , what is meant to be and what should have been in its stead..
try an Exercise : try not to judge anyone for a day! -- You wont make past your first hour at work!
and u'd shortly begin with your usual,
'that lady there needs sense matching her shoes!'
'oh dear! that blob guy should not be eating that chocolate'
'why did she divorce such an amazing guy!'
'she needs to tune down a bit'
now hold it there and think a little..
probably that is the only pair of shoes she has, probably he is eating that chocolate bar cause of all the stress at work! maybe she had to divorce that 'amazing' guy because he kept on abusing her parents or beating her the hell up! and she was tuned high because she was trying to keep away from her sad thoughts and just go out have some fun!
how does that make u feel?
now this isn't that pretty a picture, is it?
did your judgment ease their pain? did your judgment make u happy ? no it did not! none of it was useful! Then why judge at all?
I hope someday we all rid ourselves of this tedious self assigned task of judging everyone and everything around us and just let them be, let things be the way they are..
we are all just playing the game, no one has been given an extra edge or a headstart or the power to see some transparent script in the air written by the goddess of light indexing things that are meant to be in a particular order.
Just accept them the way they are.
they all are precious.
Lets us all try pausing our judgment machine for a while and try loving people instead for who they are. Let us please try ..
a little 'warning triangle' for all the 'judges' out there : while you are passing your smartypants judgmental comments, people are judging you!
first word: brilliant post!! I agree with the fact that no one has any right to judge anyone, unless you know that person in person...
ReplyDeletebut often, if you want to life your life your way and stay away from the kind of people you don't like, you have to judge..
As I always say, there is nothing wrong in judgement. Everyone is judgemental in some way or the other. It's what you judge decides your character. Judging someone on petty things like clothes, etc..THAT is just pathetic..
thank you :-) you are always very generous with ur comments :)
ReplyDeletei believe even if u are judging some one u know personally, you can not always be very sure that u know whats up with them that leads to a bizarre behaviour on their side.
We usually end up saying things like 'kitna badal gaya be tu..' and never realize probably the situation demanded a major change and though we feel the change is bad, that was probably the only option. so whether u know them or u dont, judgment on your part should be avoided when unnecessary.
hmmm..agreed..but sometimes you are so frustrated with your life and times, ki kitna bhi avoid karo judgemental hona....gaali nikal hi jaati hai muh se... :P
ReplyDeletehahah.. true.. but that is when we have to try hard and not be judgmental... judgments passed in frustration can be more hurting and totally wrong! *look whoz talkin* :-P
ReplyDeleteGood 1! Learnt from your experience I guess :P
ReplyDeleteI am sure one of those judgments was made on you.
ReplyDeleteoops! there i go judging again!
see?? Its that difficult to Not Judge! But i get your point. and yes, this will rid me of all the overhead of judging things and people.
Thanks !
This is what i love about personal blogs! Everything you awesome writers write is so much connected to our lives.
Looking for more from you ^^
hey Prachi!
DeleteThanks for your 'you awesome writers' part of ur comment :)
Yea you are right :-) One of them was recently passed on me by someone i love.. But that isn't what this post is about...
and i get what you mean when u say its difficult to NOT Judge.. But then , lets us all try :)
oh yea and thanks for +1 too :)